Spam-a-Palooza

spam n. Unsolicited e-mail, often of a commercial nature, sent indiscriminately to multiple mailing lists, individuals, or newsgroups; junk e-mail. http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/Spam

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

A Suspense Account! Spam from Africa...

From :Miss Rose wanta
Add:43 rue de angree djibi
ABIDJAN COTE D'IVOIRE WEST AFRICA


Dear Respectful One and a fine day to you, bitch!

Permit me to inform you of my desire of going into business relationship with you. I got your contact from the International web site directory you mean the internets? 'De world wide web? THE WORLD HIVE BRAIN!? Sure, go on....

I prayed over it over what? and selected your name lucky me! among other names ooh, unlucky thems! due to it's esteeming nature you're Goddamned RIGHT, I'm esteemed! and the recommendations given to me as a reputable and trust worthy person I can do business with from whom? EVERYTHING THEY SAY IS THE LIES! LIES! and by their recommenddations whomever "they" may be I must not hesitate SO QUIT WASTING TIME, CORKY! to confide in you for this simple and sincere business.

I am Rose wanta Fanta, the only Daughter of late Mr and Mrs George dont'cha Wanta Fanta My father was a very wealthy cocoa merchant in Abidjan, geography lesson alert: the economic capital of Ivory Coast, before he was poisoned to death which sucks only a bit more than being "poisoned into incapacitation" but is perhaps WAY worse than being "poisoned to slight irritation" by his business associates et tu, Bruté? on one of their outing to discus on a business deal and also the poisoning. Mr Wanta never DID read memorandums carefully.

When my mother died on the 21st October 1996 ...it was the 3rd of September..., my father took me special That day I'll always remember...Yes I will... because i am motherless look, kids! A bastard child!. Before the death of my father on 30th June 2003 in a private hospital here in Abidjan 'cause of the poison...And stuff..

He secretly called me on his bedside he was way into this ninja shit and told me that he has a sum of $7.500.000 (Seven Million, five hundred thousand dollars) left in a suspense dun dun DUNNNNN! account in a local Bank ooh, they have more than one! here in Abidjan, that he used my name as his only Daughter 'cause he felt bad just making up names for the next of kin in deposit of the fund.And i have my small brother he's a little person. My little brother in BOTH senses, it's really beautiful call mark Wanta Fanta
He also explained to me verrrrrry slowwwwwly that it was because of this wealth and some huge amount of money what, some random fucking amount of money? his business associates supposed to balance him what? from the deal they had, that he was poisoned by his business associates 'cause FUCK HIM, if he won't balance, let's kill him! No thought of where the monies may be, just kill him. kill him dead. with Drain-O., that I should seek for a God fearing God TERRIFIES me. He often takes my lunch monies. foreign partner in a country of my choice how nice! where I will transfer this money and use it for investment purpose, (such as real estate management) oh, suddenly you have a moment of clarity. Real estate management isn't all it's cracked up to be, missy...May I recommend "hookers and beer?".

Sir, we are honourably seeking your assistance in the following ways.

1) To provide a Bank account where this money would be transferred to done..

2) To serve as the guardian of this since I am a gilr a what? A gilr monster? of 19 (tender) years.
Moreover Sir, i am willing to offer you 20% of the sum as compensation for effort input after the successful transfer of this fund to your designate account overseas. So let me get this straight...I open an account, I serve as your guardian and I receive big US monies. Hmmm...No getting killed with the blunt objects? No untimely doom? No scamming me out of MY monies? SIGN ME UP, SODA GIRL!

Thanks and God Bless. Ooh, you're welcome!

Best regards.

Miss Rose wanta Fanta!

2 Comments:

At 3:56 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is actually a fun spam to interact with. I have been sending emails back and forth with the Rose Wanta and it is actually compelling to see how far someone will go to get your personal information. I am actually considering setting up a bank account so that she may come visit me and give me 20% of what in my email said 12.5 million. Anyway I hope that everyone is as careful as the two of us have been and steer clear of the people in the ivory coast.

 
At 2:14 PM, Blogger otowi said...

oh how I hate those fanta commercials! :)

 

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